SUPER KIKI

I was a comic book kid, I loved reading my comics,There was a comic book store 1/4 mile from my house and I would walk there with my mom or my sister(s) and buy trading cards & comics, I watched superhero cartoons like x-men and Spiderman on Saturday morning, and the old old school batman was my show, I watched it everyday, I could have been outside playing with all the kids in the neighborhood, 4:30 rolled around my mom would yell out the front door and I was in for the next 30 min to watch batman *BAM* *POW*! This week was the first "problem" that came of this.

let me explain the events that lead up to this issue.................

Before I became a mom, I was an Aunt.... And I LOVE being an aunt! My nephew is quite possibly my favorite boy in the world, and he is well aware of it. He has his KiKi wrapped around his little finger and has for 4 full years! Well today was his birthday party, he turned 4 Wed. of this past week and we celebrated today.

During the planning of this event Lipshun asked me "what do you want to make for the party" I replied "I don't care what would you like me to make" and in reply she stated "I don't know" 

so to avoid the conversation going on in circles I stated "Ask My Favorite boy what he wants KiKi to make" This would be where things went south!

He then said "super hero cookies"

Sounded reasonable, I am a good artist and I'm good with icing, should be no problem! WELL I was mistaken, 1st problem would be the timing! Big boy was on day shift most of the week, so I had no relief with A-bunny to bang out 3 dozen cookies! that was the big one! so a project that should have taken 4 or 5 hours wound up taking 12 due to breaking for "reading" or "playing" lunch, dinner, diapers, naps and all that comes with A-bunny! 

Problem #2 royal icing is a huge pain in the butt compared to butter cream or thicker decorators icings. It is runny and unruly and harder to work detail with!

I am a perfectionist, I like what I do to be perfect, and let me just tell you I was having some major issues with Batman!!!

Once my favorite childhood hero, now my Nemesis! It is almost impossible to make jet black royal icing, almost always comes out gray, so I used decorators icing store bought from a tube ( not proud of this but I was on a time crunch!) because I KNEW it would be jet black...... the consistency of this icing is much thicker, and much more defined, you don't get the pretty sheen and smoothness from the royal. So BATMAN my arch enemy was just not measuring up to my standards, no matter what I did, I was not happy with his cookie, so I decided there shall only be 5! Now of course that isn't the only issue! The coolest cookie, My star design, the one I drew up the minute after  Lipshun told me what he wanted was the most labor intensive! it was Spiderman face, web and all! the thing looked so cool and when I tested it looked even cooler, problem is it took twice as long to do as superman and batman combined! ( Superman was not unruly, he gets a pass on this particular issue!)

All in all My favorite boy liked his hero cookies and I got them done and everyone else seemed to like them, so it was a success. As much as I complain, I was very happy with my end result and I would def do it again ( just so long as big boy is home to occupy A-bunny!)..... 

HOWEVER Batman and I will be revisiting this issue "You can't win anyway... You see, I hold the winning card!" 

Mommy Milestone

As I have stated before I have a whole host of quirks in my personality! Lots of OCD and neurosis! One of which I developed as a teenager! When I was 15 years old due to PTSD I developed a panic disorder.( it was 6 months after my grandfather passed away and my mother had her BIG surgery for her cancer) When I was younger it was terrible! I could hardly drive as a passenger in a car without having an attach, large social situations I felt uncomfortable and began to panic, and slowly through the course of 2 years became a shut in. (this was largely due to traumatic event continuing to happen during this time, mom got re-diagnosed & hospitalized a few times, a couple of car accidents, my good friends father died in 9/11, my mom passed away, my boyfriend at the time step father passed away LOTS of trauma) I wound up leaving HS for my GED, then leaving my post HS job because of it ( couldn't drive myself 3 miles down the street to work on a rainy morning had to have my father pick me up on the side of the road because I couldn't breath).

I would hardly leave my house to do anything for nearly 6 months! 

Finally one night my Lipshun ( big sister) made me get up and drive myself down to the gas station, yelling at me that if I wanted something I needed to get out of the house and stop being so scared of everything! That was the start of me coming back to society!

I still have flair ups from time to time, but NOTHING like when I was younger, I have learned to manage it without medication and with lots of hard work on my part!

However there are still things I "freak out" about doing, such as driving on major highways, or driving in the snow, and entering a party or restaurant alone( can do without issue if someone I am meeting is inside already), or being out at a restaurant or party alone.

That said, I hit my own milestone this weekend! I was very stressed from the past few weeks, with the birthday party, A-bunny has been in rare form, lots of complaining & tantrums just an all together foul mood on her part (she got a tooth Monday morning)

Thursday night was my breaking point, A-bunny went to bed at 9pm like usual, and  I stayed up to do dishes & unwind.... I went to bed around 12:30, by 1am she was screaming in her room. I got up and tried to calm her down in the bed and it was not happening, so I put her in bed with me, she then began to toss and turn and beat the poop out of me! so we went back into her room...... 3 hours later @ 4am she finally fell back to sleep & I was able to get to bed finally at 4:30. And then was up at 7:30 am! so we had a no sleep night, and then following suit with her foul mood, she had a no nap day! the child refused to nap all day long! finally at about 3pm my husband ordered me off to take a nap and said "you are going out tonight you need to sleep then get out of the house without her for a while"

so I listened, because at this point I was being so cranky and snippy I couldn't even stand me! I napped from 3:30 till 7pm and went to do some shopping..... by the time I was finished I was famished & really wanting to treat myself to a margarita, and since you cant take out a margarita, I sucked up my fear and headed to a Mexican restaurant on the way back home! It was wonderful to be out on my own, relaxing and exciting that I did not have an attach!

you will be proud to hear I did not have a panic attach, I was able to sit, eat my dinner & drink my single margarita all by my lonesome with no issues at all! I was so proud of myself I had to write about it!

now we just have to work on the major highway driving and snow driving and I could be cured of the wretched handicap I have!

The Cupcake Brigade

To start off the "stories" pertaining to A-bunnies 1st birthday extravaganza I think this would be he perfect one. I  LOVE cupcakes, so very much that I can eat 24 of them inside of 5 days completely by my lonesome! Since everything else for a-bunny is brown and pink, I figured I would change things up with her birthday party and do an Orange and pink "cupcake" theme party. Cute right!? 

As everyone has probably figured out I LOVE to cook, the very little T.V. viewing I do is mostly food network & cooking channel! And normally and party I throw I make most of the food, and purchase all of the baked goods! This particular party I changed up my game, I purchased the food and decided to bake all of the brownies and CUPCAKES, as well as decorate them!

No big deal right? WRONG! When the RSVP list hit 70 adults and 25 children I knew I was in a world of hurt! So I went out and bought all the supplies I would need to make 4 batches of cupcakes! (96 of the little suckers!) as well as supplies to ice them and bake an additional 2 batches of brownies! Starting at 9 am Friday morning ( party on Sat.) I began to bake, and ice alternating each for 5 hours.... 5 hours not bad, Big boy was manning the birthday bunny so I was free to bang everything out, well almost! After being in the kitchen and additional 90 min personally decorating each cupcake, I go into the living room for a little break and I notice my daughter in her pack n play playing by herself, and big boy napping on the couch ( guess she tired him out). So I got set back about an hour to let him sleep.

I was then starving ( forgot to eat during this fiasco, i was running off the cupcake batter left in the bowl & icing left in the pastry bag!) so I decided to hold off on the brownies to cook dinner, so I cleaned everything up and started on the pork chops.... after we ate I started decorating again and baking individual brownies inside cupcake wrappers ( genius idea if I do say so myself no cutting mess and they all look pretty!) 

SOOOO by the time everything was finished, family was fed, and everything was packed for Sat. it was PM, a full 12 hour day of strictly baking and icing! I will be going back to cooking for my parties, I can make enough sausage and peppers to feed an army and is restaurant quality in less then 6 hours!

BUT I have to say I was very happy with my end result, they came out beautiful all 88 of them ( the batter never ACTUALLY makes 24 cupcakes, its a jip!) and 40 brownie cups!

take a look for yourself!( I cannot take credit for the huge cupcake that work of art was done by a friend! and it was fantastic!)

P.S. A-bunny had her 1 year check yesterday, in the past year she gained 16 lbs 6 oz & grew 9.5 inches taller!  and is on track or a bit ahead with all her milestones!

Birthday Bunny

One year ago at around this time of night, I was having NO luck sleeping at all, I was in a ton of pain..... every 6-10 min to be exact! 15 hours later the next day my pretty princess arrived, and my life changed forever.
For those who do not know I will give you a little back story of what lead up to this fantastic day in my life.
the prelude was not so fantastic!
After 11 months of trying unsuccessfully, the stick finally had a 2nd line and the fun began!
At the start of my pregnancy I was very lucky, no real morning sickness... nausea of course but nothing serious... half of my 2nd trimester was a breeze, I was a proud expecting mama sporting my baby bump in tight tunic tops and leggings and feeling fantastic..... as soon as I hit my halfway point at 20 weeks, things turned for the worse! I began getting terrible pain in my abdomen and later found out I had strained a ligament in my uterus... I was put on modified bed rest at 26 weeks,I also began having contractions at this time ( not in a pattern about 3-6 an hour) so they confined to my house, only allowed to get up to go to the bathroom, get food if I was alone and shower or take a bath.... it was awful until 36 weeks, then they lifted a lot of me restrictions because I was closer to my due date.
which was a relief considering I started contracting 10-15 min apart at 33 weeks.... these freaking things lasted 6 weeks.... all day everyday no breaks, I just kept getting told "don't call until the are 5-6 min apart and in a pattern" so I waited and waited, 6 weeks of timing contractions doctors appointments weekly for 8 weeks..... and finally two days before they were going to induce my labor @ 39 weeks, I started active labor at 8PM at night after I had done all the "Tricks" to kick start labor .... oh yeah folks, did them all!
16 hours later after a lot of tears, no sleep, an epidural and 2 boosters I started to push. and continued to push for an hour...........................................






On April 18th, at 4:15pm a little princess was born, 7lbs 6oz and 21 1/2 inches long.
she was the only newborn I have even seen with chubby cheeks and she was HEAVENLY!
and her name is Angela Kathleen

That day I felt what I knew was coming for 9 months.... unconditional love! I have never seen a more beautiful thing in my entire life, and all the pain from the pregnancy and the 6 WEEKS of contractions proceeding my labor, they all melted away.

I know it sounds cliche' to say and I feel cheesy just typing it, but it is true, I have never loved something or someone this much in my life!

On A- bunnies first birthday her stats & fave's are as follows
7 adorable pearly white teeth that she loves to brush with her cartoon tooth brush
cherub curled strawberry blond hair identical to her mommy
walks 95% of the time independently
has a 13 word vocabulary ( that you can understand not all totally formed words but you can understand)
Is wearing size 18mo clothing and 4.5 shoe
fave food is pasta & meatballs
fave fruit is banana
fave veggie PEAS
Fave snack "DOODLES" ( Gerber puffs i promise not Cheetos's )
fave activity "READ ME PEASE"
loves to dance

I don't have her medical stats till Tues but you can bet your bottom I will be posting along with pic's from her first birthday party.
stay tuned for that one too, going to give all the fun details about the party! And the week leading up to it... but today It is all about my Bunny on her birthday!
Mommy loves you, Happy birthday pretty girl!

sleep training blues

I am having the HARDEST time sleep training A-bunny! She breast fed for 9 months, and in turn got use to falling asleep while eating in my arms. Now she is 1 week shy of being a year old and still needs to be cradled to sleep! She cannot fall asleep with me in her room with her, she gets distracted and just wants me, if i leave the room she cries and complains & then winds up playing in her crib and talking to herself, but not sleeping.... she can be deliriously tiered and hardly have her eyes open but its seems almost out of spite will do everything except fall asleep..... she has gone 90 min strait the course of an entire nap without sleeping, just crying for me to pick her up.
as soon as i pick her up her head goes on my shoulder or chest and she knocks out.... its a crap shoot! I don't know what to do about it, its terrible, and she is not a tiny 1year old!
shes around 31 inches long and circling around 25lbs! I cannot cradle her anymore!
i really wish i would have known this would happen! I would not have let her fall asleep while eating! or i might have stopped breast feeding at 6 months like i wanted to!


the reason for this blog is not that i have free time, it is that i am in the next room listening to my A-bunny protest, I was in there but I needed a break from the room, this has been going on for almost 2 hours!

back in to sing more songs.... fingers crossed for me that the waves the white flag soon!

please excuse my absence

Just a reminder, this weekend is a VERY big event in our family, Our little princess Will be 1 year old next week and we will be celebrating this weekend!

Due to the timing and things still left to cover for the grand event, I may not have time to jump on here with any fun and exciting stories!

Not to worry! I am POSITIVE I will make up for it next week with recaps and photo's!

I may still jump on if I hit any speed bumps or drama in the in between to vent! but stay tuned!

Language barrier

A-bunny is trying to say EVERYTHING these days,she is picking things up like a sponge. The only problem is she has the 1 year old muddled toddler language going on. Now usually i am pretty good at interpreting her, but she's trying to say so much now that it is getting harder and harder!

she's got a bunch of words down, for instance a-bunny say the following clear as day "me, baby, no, mom ,dada, up, cup, tickle, read, and doodle"

other words she can partially pronounce are " moon, milk, puff, water, dance, bear, please and bath" these are a little harder to understand she can annunciate them properly yet

but the kid tries to say EVERYTHING

she asked me to "read me please" tonight ( as usual) and I started to read her goodnight moon for the 30th time today, and she grabbed the book and says "me read"

then she proceeds to baby babble and turn the pages as if she is reading me the story. Cute right? 

Well she then did this with "my personal penguin" and " the dump truck book"

then we got to polar bear polar bear what did you hear.... this is where it got real cute, she's now interacting with the books, as I ask each animal what they hear, she tried saying the next animal's name.... and every time we get to the hippopotamus is sit and think of big daddy... hip   hip-hop   hip-hop-antonymous.... that's what she sounds like  she is saying.... its very muddledand jumbled but she is sounding it out and trying her hardest to get it!

Each time I sit and think about these big leaps and bounds she has been making I get a little sad, although I am totally proud and am happy she's on track and doing so well, I swear I was just pregnant with her, feeling her move around, and it makes me sad that its going by so fast!

I feel like I am going to blink and it'll be 15 years from taking her to the dmv for her drivers permit and i want 2 cry!